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Stop Dying For Your Fashion ! March 29, 2011

Posted by msbobbieg in Uncategorized.
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The Spring/Fashion season is upon us and  with that being said I want to share some fashion trivia with you that may make you laugh a bit but hopefully it will help you become more thankful for the precious gift you already possess.  I hope you all will enjoy.  – Caution – Reader & Viewer discretion is advised – Mature content is present.

 Fashion Flat Liners 

                                                                 

By: Bobbie Jones

 

            Ah, Gucci, Prada, Dolce & Gabbana – a little Mark Jacob.  What about Jimmy Choo?  Yes, many of you will recognize these names right off the bat, on the other hand people like me would need a fashion house dictionary just to keep up.  Most of these designer names are at the top of the fashion chain and as I have even heard some people say in passing, they would “Die” for a pair of Jimmy Choo’s – Really?        

            So, does fashion have your head spinning?  Well, the real question is with everybody around you telling what to wear and who to wear, how have you managed not to string yourself up? – But I bet you have thought about it.

  Well, today I want to try a little experiment, probably something never done in the history of writing.  While telling this story I am going to try on a couple of pieces of fashion that have been deemed sexy. Yessss, sexy – that thing that we “gals” are supposed to be.  So, let me start with the ever so popular “High heel shoe” 

 

            As I go about putting them on I will share a few facts with you.  Now, for women that wear the ultra high heel, I am sure you know they can be quite fashionable but did you know the serious damage you can do to your precious feet not to mention your entire body.  As you walk in heels your entire body shifts forward putting undo pressure on your knees and joints…. (Hold on – let me try to stand up now that I have my heels on).

            Trying to get balance in heels is another chore altogether (Let me try to walk… oh, I think I got my heel caught in the carpet – ops, I just tripped).  Well, while I’m down here on the floor – did you know one major cause for those ugly bunions and corns on your feet are these pointy toe, high heel shoes we so desire to make are legs look sexy.?

            When the foot is jammed in tight and the toes are squeezed together the big toe is out of alignment and over time a bony growth appears on the outer edge of the big toe.

Well, since I’m sitting here on the floor still, let me try on this great fashion invention called the “Thong.”  Yes, this thong thing – they even made a song about it (Thong-the-thong-thong-thong).  That guy must have been a musical genius but moving on – I am going to put on this thong. “Should I take these shoes off first?”  (Ops, my heel got caught in the thong, gotta free it, hold on.)  Damn stretchy lace!  Well, why I figure out how to free myself I want you to ask yourself this question.  “How many times have you seen a man in this contraption?”  But I bet you have seen him in theses >

No strings to pull out of his A$$ – right?                (Stole from Ex-BF)      

            Let me try to stand up now that I got my thong and heels on, (Oh, I think I twisted my ankle when I tripped.)  Did you also know high heels impair balance and produces a greater chance of tripping and falling therefore, causing more sprained and broken ankles?  Watch Video below

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHzH5cJnFZ8&feature=related

 These thong things (say that 3 times fast) are doing you more harm than good as well.  When you keep pulling them down and back up after every bathroom pit stop you are transferring bacteria from your bottom to your V-JJ (Vagina). That piece of string that fits in your crack is getting sexier by the minute – huh?

            Now, for the ladies that are putting these things on just to get attention from a man think about this.  Is that horrible feeling you have all day of strings in your butt and the pain of your jammed up feet worth the trade-off when as soon as you turn your head your so-called man will be checking out another one of these >

as it passes by?  Think about it.

            Dear hearts – get a grip and don’t let your fashion put you under – six feet under that is.  All that stress and strain for what reason and what have you gained?  I don’t see the benefit.  So, what have we learned form this little experiment?  That Bobbie is Clumsy – (Nooo).  Maybe that Bobbie should leave the sexy wear for the sexy people – Ha ha, funny but that’s not the lesson either.

            The lesson is, your body is way too precious and deserves much better treatment than you may be giving it.  Don’t let the fashion houses or people on the street or some over-sexed, pot-belly, deranged idiot on Viagra dictate what you should be wearing or how you should wear it.  Your comfort and happiness should be job one.  Take care of yourselves out there, and get yourself some sensible shoes                                       

God Bless & Good luck

– Photos of foot wear taken by:  Bobbie Jones

–  Other images in peice provide by: Google Images on the web

–  Copyright Bobbie Jones – March 2011

All Rights Reserved

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Side Note:  And, please people – Stop putting $1400.00 Cartier glasses on your children, that is if you still want them to come home alive.  $1400.00 – I wonder how many house payments that might be ?  hummmmm.

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